More assumptions from the food services industry...

I've already touched on some of the assumptions the good people at your local purveyors of average food make about you. Here's another one:

If you ask for water, they will give you the smallest cup ever because they assume that you like to exercise and, as an extension of this, like to get up every three minutes to refill your glass of water.

Seriously. I know this is some half-ass attempt to make sure I don't steal soda from you, but can I please just get a normal cup? I promise not to steal your Mountain Dew and, if I do happen to steal a tasty beverage from you, it'll only cost you about nineteen cents.

A fast food worker's confidence in you is low ...

There are two reasons why I believe/know that fast food workers have little to no confidence in the consumer:

1) They apparently think, regardless of the more apparent clues to your personal hygiene practices, that you are the messiest person on the face of the planet. This is why they give you some many napkins despite the fact that most of us could do with just one or two.

2) No matter how much or how little of a condiment you ask for they don't think you really know what you want, so they just put a shitload (shitload being an industry term).

These are things I know to be true about 'fast food'.